Finding Me Again

Today, I looked in the mirror and asked myself a difficult question:

What have I done?

I’ve struggled with my weight for most of my life. I’ve been overweight since I was a teenager. I’ve started diets, stopped diets, lost weight, gained it back, and promised myself more times than I can count that this time would be different.

Years ago, I lost 100 pounds.

I was younger then. More focused. More committed.

Somewhere along the way, life happened.

The weight slowly came back, and one day I realized I was carrying more than I wanted to—physically and emotionally.

But today, something feels different.

I made a promise to myself.

And I made a promise to my son.

I want to enjoy life.

I don’t want to spend the rest of my years wishing I had started sooner. I don’t want to keep putting my life on hold until I reach a certain number on a scale.

I want to live now.

Yes, I need to lose weight.

And yes, I am starting again.

But while I work toward that goal, I am not going to stop living.

I will do my hair.

I will take care of myself.

I will smile in photos.

I will go places, make memories, and enjoy the life I’ve been given.

Because my life doesn’t begin when I lose the weight.

My life is happening right now.

Losing weight is not an event.

It’s a journey.

A journey filled with victories and setbacks, motivation and frustration, progress and plateaus.

This time, I’m not chasing perfection.

I’m chasing a better life.

There will be days when I struggle. Days when I want to quit. Days when I feel discouraged.

But I will not give up again.

I’ve spent too many years waiting.

I deserve a healthy life.

I deserve a happy life.

And most importantly, I deserve to become the woman I’ve always known I could be.

So today, I begin again.

And this time, I’ll share the journey.

Not because I have all the answers.

But because maybe someone else is standing in front of a mirror, asking themselves the same questions.

If that’s you, you’re not alone.

Today, I’m choosing me.

Today, I’m choosing health.

Today, I’m choosing life.