I’ve been an observer for as long as I can remember, even as a child.
Anywhere I am, I’m always noticing what is happening around me. I observe people, their actions, their reactions, and different situations. If I’m in a public place, I scan my surroundings. Not because I’m paranoid or expecting something bad to happen, but because my mind naturally wants to know what is going on around me.
Being observant can be a good quality. I think being aware of your surroundings is important. You notice things. You pay attention. You don’t always react immediately.
I’m also very analytical, and I think the two go together for me. I observe, think, analyze, process, and then act. I like to understand a situation before reacting to it.
But is being an observer always a good thing?
I don’t think so.
Sometimes observing means you’re not completely enjoying the moment because your mind is still working.
I noticed this when I traveled to New York with my son. I was excited to be there and wanted to enjoy the experience with him, but I was also constantly aware of the people around us. I would scan our surroundings and make sure my son was walking in front of me where I could see him.
Was I enjoying New York? Absolutely.
But part of my mind was always working.
Who is around us? Where is my son? What is happening around me?
That can make a vacation a little overwhelming. Sometimes you just want to walk, look around, take everything in, and enjoy where you are. But when you’re an observer, it can be difficult to turn that part of your brain off.
Sometimes I also wonder if this is one of the reasons my circle of friends is so small.
When you observe people closely, you notice things. You notice how they treat others. You notice their words, their actions, and sometimes the little things that don’t quite match. And once I notice something, it’s hard for me not to think about it.
That doesn’t mean my observations are always right. Sometimes I could simply be overanalyzing. People are complicated, and one moment doesn’t tell you everything about someone.
But I do think being observant has made me more selective about the people I allow close to me.
So, is being an observer a quality or a weakness?
For me, I think it can be both.
It has taught me to pay attention, think before I act, and be aware of what is happening around me. But it has also taught me that there are times when I need to stop watching everything around me.
Because sometimes, while you’re busy observing life, you can forget to simply live it.
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